Monday, March 19, 2012

A Tough Season

As a Christian, I know that I am not immune from trials, heartache, and loss. Actually, I know that God confirms I will have it all, but He will be there for me (my family) every step of the way. Sometimes I go through a tough season, and I don't even realize it because my faith is so strong, and I am just confident in every step I take, and know that God is there. Other times, I go through a tough season, and I am so shaken by it, it consumes my thoughts, my prayers (which I guess is a good thing) and my mind. My faith, regrettably is weak, as I/we struggle through our current trial with our sweet son, Manuel. I apologize for the vagueness (is that a word? :)) of my last post and now this one, but until we have a definitive answer, I don't want to speculate, assume, etc. Just know that he is really struggling (not academically, thank goodness!) with some personal issues and they have really become the forefront of our family, at this time. About two and a half weeks ago, seemingly overnight, Manuel changed. He just became a different child...mentally and emotionally. We are doing what needs to be done as his parents to get him the help he needs and figure out what in the world is going on. It's an awful predicament, as a parent, to see your child struggling, and have no clue why it's happening and knowing that other than the outside help you are seeking and LOTS of prayers, there is nothing you can do! It's a tough balance between paying attention to his needs vs. what he's just doing for attention vs. what he can't control vs. what is just natural behavior for a child vs. totally losing your mind (and your temper) because you can't help him! ;) But he's doing so much better then where he was two + weeks ago, and I have no doubt that God's hand is all over this situation as that is the exact same time our church started praying for him. It was good to talk about it with our small group at church yesterday (as they are all parents with children ranging in age from about 6 months to 17 years old! :)) So we had lots of prayers, input and advice. I can tell this small group is just what we need and going to be such a blessing! As we get "answers" I will be sure to share (with Manuel's privacy in mind) what is going on. But for now, I just ask for continued prayers! :)

And then, in the midst of the tough season, my sweet boy shines through, and I know THIS is who he is, and I pray that this is just a tough stage he's going through as he navigates life, what he hears at school, just growing up in general, etc. (It blows my mind the things that children are exposed at SUCH an early age!) We had a good weekend, and these are the moments I thank God for! :) We are within driving distance of BWI Airport and right by the airport is playground where you can play, watch the airplanes, etc. So with the awesome Maryland weather we've been having, we took the kids on Saturday! It was just what my soul needed! :)

And for good measure..
This is actually a shot from last weekend that I never shared...SO cute! :)


Mandee said...

I think that you are doing the right thing. I have no idea what is going on with your son, but putting it in God's hands and looking to him for help is definitely going to get you to where you need to be faster. We are actually having quite a few struggles in our family at the moment with the decision of schools. Our children are in public schools (a very small and good school) however we feel that the other children are not necessarily a great influence on children and we want more for them, so we are considering the Christian school, but that would also result in a move to a town about 30 minutes away. Ok, enough about me! Sorry! I hope and pray that you are able to get the answers you are looking for.

Jackie said...

I am just catching up on posts since Thea's birth, and I'm so sorry to hear that Manuel is still struggling. Your family will be in my thoughts as you figure out how to best help him!

And I love the pics! Your kids are the cutest!


Courtney B said...

Definitely praying, still!! Love you sweet friend!
Are things going even better? I hope so! Manuel is so precious and it breaks my heart that he has to go through this confusing time at such a young age :(